Faux Transformers: Game-a-cons

In my previous post, I wrote about my Autobot’s big helper from the knock-off shelf.  The Decepticons didn’t get any help in terms of size, but they did get strength in numbers with a small group I loosely called “the Game-a-cons” back then (I wish I could have thought of a better name…ugh).  These four poor Decepticons weren’t blessed with powerful alt-modes or large bodies, but they made up for it in moxie and loyalty.  At least, that’s how I went with it.  In reality they were five dollar toys that didn’t move too fast at the local drug store.  Over the years, I’ve held onto them and kept them in decent shape.  The slot machine still works, the pinball machine still works, the roulette wheel still kinda works, and the cash register didn’t really have anything to work, so it works by default.   They don’t have a lot of articulation or pose-ability, but I’m guessing not many of these are left in working order.  So, here’s a look at how I used these four in my TF universe, along with some more toy-related comments.

1.  Slotbot

Profile: Slotbot is a thief, plain and simple.  He’s almost as happy sitting in a casino in his slot machine mode, slowly draining some poor person’s life savings away as he is fighting Autobots.  It is really the only thieving he can do anymore, as his Earthform is small, bulky and weak.  Cashicon can always count on Slotbot to provide any financial backing to a new scheme.  Unlike other Decepticons, Slotbot is surprisingly brave.  He’ll volunteer for missions and battles that clearly exceed his abilities, yet somehow he keeps surviving.  Slotbot’s bravery isn’t noble; Slotbot is a gambler, and he only has his life to wager.

Powers: Slotbot can operate on very little power for long periods of time.  Like the other game-a-cons, Slotbot is also able to recharge in alt-mode by simply being plugged in.  He can manipulate light, sound and electrical impulses in slot machine mode, which often causes humans using him to keep playing long after they should stop.  In robot mode, he can launch small coins as high-speed projectiles from his chest opening.

Weaknesses: Slotbot is bulky and slow, which has ruined his former life as a master thief.  His arms are poorly designed, and he is among the weakest of the Decepticons.  His slot machine form sometimes malfunctions, resulting in huge payouts.  These malfunctions can render him depressed and useless for long periods of time.

My Slotbot still works as a toy slot machine.  The arms are poorly designed, but the legs are probably the best of the four.

2.  Tilt

Profile: Tilt is just unlucky.  Other Decepticons hate having him along, as he’s often thought of as being cursed.  The youngest of the game-a-cons, Tilt often finds himself in arcades, gas stations, restaurants or someplace else to keep him out of the way.  Other Decepticons don’t give him the time of day, even when he’s able to pick up a valuable transmission.  Tilt looks up to Cashicon more than Megatron, but Cashicon often shuns his opportunities to mentor Tilt.  Tilt wants to be a good, loyal soldier, but the constant bad treatment he receives from other Decepticons occasionally make him consider defecting to the Autobots.  He’s not convinced life as an Autobot would be any easier, so he sticks with the devil he knows.

Powers: In pinball machine mode, Tilt is a fully functional pinball game.  His lights and sounds disguise the fact his head is crammed with sensory equipment designed to analyze a number of radio frequencies.  If Tilt has chosen his location correctly, he has the ability to intercept and monitor Autobot communications.  In robot mode, his equipment makes him a walking repeater, allowing the Decepticons to greatly increase their radio range.  His eyes are also high output lasers, but using those lasers is an immense power drain (never mind the fact he’s blind while using them in such a fashion).

Weaknesses: Tilt is often forgotten about, and sometimes he finds himself on his own for weeks or months at a time.  His small size in robot mode is also hampered by poorly designed legs, making him incredibly slow and clumsy.

Tilt was the one of this set of four I didn’t buy myself.  I had to find him at a garage sale years later (hence the broken arm).  In robot mode, he has a pinball game for a back, which means other Decepticons could just bend him over for a quick game.  Maybe I could have phrased that better…  Seriously, his arms are probably the most pose-able of any of these guys, and the legs, while only having hip joints, aren’t terrible.

3. Roulette

Profile: When it comes to unique abilities, Roulette is tough to beat.  Hidden throughout his body are multiple weapons systems that are surprisingly powerful for a robot of his size.  The downside is that Roulette can only use one ability at a time, and that ability is tied directly to whichever number is spun in his alt mode.  Roulette has tried to get this issue fixed on several occasions, but the exact nature of the problem has never been pinned down.  Roulette is normally pretty laid back, but in battle having the wrong ability has been known to send his circuits into a tizzy.  However, on some occasions, Roulette has also been known to find unique ways to use his weapons, so he’s not a Decepticon to be taken lightly.

Powers: Roulette has a number of weapon systems, including blasters, electric blasts, freeze rays, and more.  Most of those abilities are tied to his arms, but some are projected through his chest, and others his eyes.  He has no choice in what ability he’s going to use, unless he transforms to roulette table mode and spins that particular ability.  Each of his abilities is connected to a different number on his wheel, and once spun, Roulette transforms and that number locks in as his power.  In roulette table mode, Roulette has a number of stabilizers and counter-measures that make it almost impossible for him to cheat on which number is selected.  Roulette is also the strongest of the Game-a-cons.

Weaknesses: Due to his complex workings, Roulette is often the first to break down.  If he’s caught in battle with one of his weaker powers, he has been known to quickly transform into his alt mode, which is very vulnerable to enemy fire.  His alt mode (automated roulette wheel) is also pretty uncommon, even in casinos.

Roulette has always been my favorite of these.  I used him so much that his roulette wheel is not only missing the original ball, it has broken free from the plastic base.  His arms have very well articulated elbows, but his legs simply keep him standing up.

4. Cashicon

Profile: Cashicon looks at Earth differently that Megatron.  Megatron seeks to control Earth by military might and terror, but Cashicon wants to control things on the human’s terms: financially.  Cashicon realized this thanks to his alt mode.  While undercover as a cash register, Cashicon realized that humans put such a value on money and credit, that he had to learn more about it to further the Decepticon cause.  Cashicon has studied Earthly commerce and has stored immense amounts of data on money, stocks, bonds, credit, banking, and commodities.  Cashicon maintains that humans would gladly turn over some of their resources for the right price.  Megatron usually dismisses Cashicon’s ideas, but Cashicon continues to act on them.  To that end, Cashicon has set up several dummy corporations and fake stock accounts.  Cashicon’s ultimate goal is to simply work the system to the point the Decepticons can buy Earth’s resources, leaving the Autobots (in theory) stuck in the position of breaking Earth’s laws to stop them.  Then, Cashicon can assume his place as one of Megatron’s closest lieutenants, if not more.

Powers: Cashicon’s brain has an almost infinite capacity for mathematical computations.  Cashicon’s level of knowledge on economics exceeds most humans, and rivals the world’s top economists.  Cashicon also has claw-mounted blasters, and limited flight with built in boot-jets.  In cash register mode, Cashicon can work as a stand-alone device, or with human operation.  Cashicon can access the internet wirelessly with even the slightest hint of wifi, or directly by the fact he needs to be hooked up to a phone line for credit card transactions.  His personal wealth is unknown, but is calculated to be growing daily.

Weaknesses:  As good with the markets and money as Cashicon is, he can’t predict everything, and sometimes finds himself on the losing end of an investment.  He has a knack for looking at the upside of any investment, when he really should be looking at the downsides as well.  He’s also been scammed out of large chunks of money by scammers and more experienced investors.  Cashicon is the leader of the Game-a-cons, but he regards that duty second to that of amassing his personal fortune.

Cashicon is probably my second favorite one of these fellows.  His head still springs out when you slide a lever in his cash register mode, and it even doubles as a money drawer.  I’ve altered his abilities to include wifi and the internet, instead of his “ability to connect with other computers”.  His legs are pretty useless, and his arms only have shoulder articulation, making him the least poseable member of the group.

So, there are my Game-a-cons.  I took a bunch of pictures, and the ones I didn’t use for the profiles shouldn’t go to waste.  Just click for a bigger view.  Thanks for reading/looking.

Faux Transformers: Daijim

If you lived in a city larger than 1,000 people in the 1980s, there was no shortage of Transformers product available.  If you found yourself in a town a bit smaller than that, you might need to settle for a “robot that transformed”.  My hometown had no toy store to speak of, but we did have one of those small-town drug stores that carried all kinds of cheap toys, coloring books, marbles and other things you might find at a dollar store now.  When the Transformers craze hit, I could usually count on finding product in nearby Sisseton or Britton, if a trip to Wapheton or Fargo wasn’t in the cards.  If I was stuck in town, the Veblen Drug store would have to do.  This is actually the store where I bought my “Shockwave” that was simply “alien robot” or something like it.  One allowance-fueled day, I went to the drug store hoping to find some baseball cards, but instead saw this “Guardian Robot” on the shelf.  The robot was huge, and the price was right, so I brought him home.  The biggest decision was whether he was going to be an Autobot or Decepticon.  I made him an Autobot, and then I had to figure out who he was and why he was suddenly there (joining my still growing Autobot forces, which included Brawn, Optimus Prime, and Sideswipe).  The box also had the name “Daijim” on it, so I went with that.  The manufacturer was something like “Oshamia”, so I took that as his home planet.  Over the years, he served the Autobot forces well, even proving to be (in size at least) a good matchup against Devastator.  One of my favorite things to do with my “robots that transform” was to think of what their entries in the Marvel Transformers Universe comics would be like, and for some reason I remember most of the entries I made.  So, here are a few pictures, and my own universe entry for Daijim.

Daijim in vehicle mode

Daijim in robot mode

Daijim close up

Profile/origin:  Daijim was one of the great warriors of the planet Oshamia.  The citizens of Oshamia were a proud robot race and considered Cybertron a “kindred spirit” and a “sister planet” in the cosmos.  Relations between the Oshamians and the Cybertronians were always cordial, until the great war.  The Oshamians refused to get involved in the battle for Cybertron, and their planet instead began to branch out and explore the cosmos.  Occasionally, they would make a trade deal with either the Autobots or Decepticons, but always for energon and never for military aid.  Daijim served on Oshamia’s ruling council, and his body was modified to resemble the other members (the ceremonial “guardian” armor and body was worn only by Oshamia’s most powerful warriors).  Daijim was the one member of the council who believed that aiding the Autobots militarily was in the planet’s best interest, but his voice was a lone one.  On a routine mission to the outskirts of Cyberton, Daijim was alerted by Autobot spies of a plot to destroy Oshamia.  Megatron had positioned several warships in a nearby nebula, and planned to harvest the energy of Oshamia’s destruction [a similar plan is how I explained the surviving Go-Bots in my TF continuity].  Daijim raced his ship back to Oshamia, in hopes of using this knowledge to sway the council, but it was too late.  His ship entered the system as Megatron’s planet-killer missle impacted Oshamia.  Furious, Daijim began a suicide attack against Megatron’s ships.  While futile, his efforts did keep Megatron from harvesting all the energy given off in Oshamia’s destruction.  Daijim’s ship was destroyed, and Daijim himself survived only to find himself hurtling through space.  Depressed and hopeless, Daijim allowed himself to lapse into stasis to let the universe decide his fate.  Daijim’s body floated for millions of years, before entering the atmosphere of Earth.  His body survived entering the atmosphere, and it impacted in what is now Northern California.  Gradually, his body was covered by mudslides and sediment.  Thousands of years later, an archaeological dig uncovered Daijim’s hand, and the call went out to the Autobots to investigate.  Optimus Prime, Brawn and Sideswipe unearthed Daijim, and revived him.  Optimus Prime caught Daijim up to speed on the great war, and Daijim told of Oshamia’s destruction.  As the lone surviving Oshamian, Daijim officially entered into a military partnership with the Autobots, vowing to serve Optimus Prime until the Decepticons were defeated.  Among the Autobots, Daijim is a proud, stoic warrior who they can count on to add muscle when needed.  Some Autobots are leery of him, as the Oshamians at times aided the Decepticons.  Optimus Prime trusts Daijim completely, and Daijim has yet to give him a reason to feel otherwise.

Powers: In monster-SUV mode, there is little terrain Daijim can’t drive through.  Plus, his vehicle mode is shockingly fast on highways (though not always street legal).  In robot mode, Daijim’s strength rivals that of Brawn’s.  His thick armor is resistant to most forms of physical or energy damage.  He wields a shoulder mounted fusion cannon, which is only a small step down from Megatron’s.  His hands can retract to launch small missiles stored in his forearms, and his “palms” contain small laser emitters. He has a rear mounted jet-pack that allows limited flight.

Weaknesses: Daijim’s hands are simply claws, which can pose problems at times.  While not as inefficient as some Autobots, Daijim requires more energon that most to operate at full capacity.  Daijim’s vehicle mode is too large for some roads, which hampers his ability to blend in with other Earth vehicles.  His stoicism is often misinterpreted as aloofness, which hasn’t helped him develop a good working relationship with other Autobots.  He spends most of his time pondering his existence as the sole surviving Oshamian, which at times can affect his performance in battle.

Lifting the veil of secrecy

When I started my wordpress blogs, this was intended to be a private blog.  It was never meant to be public, because it was never a blog.  It was going to be my online hiding spot for a book I started called 13 Shots.  Writing it all at wordpress would mean I could work on the book at work, at home, or anywhere else I found myself.  13 Shots is a story that requires a certain frame of mind.  When I started the book I was working through bouts of sadness and depression.  I had an epiphany that my sadness was a gift that would help me write something that could speak to people.  The problem I found was that writing blogs, stories, or whatever else made me really happy.  A few weeks into working on the book, I just wasn’t sad anymore, so I stopped working on it.  I put all my writing energy into Cliffhanger Theater(a daily updated story that ends on 2/28) and the rest of my energy into figuring out how to become a father (the wife and I had a baby boy last September).

One other reason I stopped working on 13 Shots?  I read what I had written, and it sucked.  There is much more bad writing to get out of my system before I commit to 13 Shots.  Cliffhanger Theater took care of a good chunk of that, and then I started 52 Cards to challenge myself to do different things.  The blog I was going to use for random writing and such has turned into my music blog, so I decided to un-private this blog.  The old 13 Shots posts are now private, but maybe I’ll post a few things once I start posting here more often.  I have another book idea I’m about to start, so I might post a few bits about that here as well.

So…yeah.  That’s all for now.